You have overcome so many challenges to have a baby and now you are a happy parent! Or maybe you are right in the middle of your IVF journey. Either way, you may already be thinking – should I reveal to my child the story of their birth? Is it better to keep egg donation a secret?
We have prepared some arguments for your consideration.
1) The best foundation for your family is honesty.
As your children grow, they will get curious about their origins and ask some uncomfortable questions. Telling your child the whole story will spare you the anxiety and constant fear that your child will discover the truth.
2) It is hard to keep secrets.
You will be surprised how hard it actually is to keep things from your close ones. It is not uncommon to discuss resemblance within the family, your child may start wondering “why am I so tall when my parents are short” or “why am I so good at literature if my parents are engineers?”
3) You will be able to tell the truth about medical history.
The doctors may ask about hereditary diseases or other medical conditions that run in the family. In case of egg donation, this information may be unknown or too revealing, so you’d have to lie.
4) This is a chance to become even closer with your son/daughter.
Many parents worry that revealing that there is no genetic connection between them and their children will alienate the latter. However, the practice shows that if you approach this matter correctly, it can bring you even closer as a family.
5) Is there a situation when it’s better to keep egg donation a secret? If your culture is strictly against it, you may consider not telling.
In any case, the decision is up to you. We will make a separate post about the best way to tell your child about egg donation – subscribe to our blog so that you don’t miss it!